I encourage you to reread the previous 3 blogs on the critical voice and then come back to this post #4.
Our goal is to use the HeartMath skill Quick Coherence to help us reduce the impact of the negative input from the “inner voice”. By using the QC technique 6 or more times a day we are stimulating new neural pathways associated with our emotional connection with the inner voice and changing our response to that voice we love to hate. Use your cell phone alarm or any trigger to remind you to check on your inner voice and give it some loving positive feedback by using the HeartMath skill to raise your resilience and increase coherence in your mind / body systems.
HeartMath defines resilience as: The capacity to prepare for, recover from and adapt in the face of stress, challenge or adversity. Or, the amount of energy you can store in your “inner” battery.
Coherence is an optimal state of functioning. Coherence is key to building resilience capacity. Renewing emotions create coherence while negative emotions deplete resilience capacity.
HeartMath techniques are designed specifically to use the science of our physiology to increase resilience and coherence.
I recommend to clients that they consider the concept of “opening their heart” to the inner voice, or anything or any situation which triggers “resistance” to or “avoidance” of the experience. One of my clients discovered that by allowing his younger daughter to express in great detail and intensity her frustration with her job rather than trying to convince her she can “find a better feeling”; she quickly left the subject once she felt he was open to her expressing her emotions rather than trying to “change” or “avoid” them.
Opening your heart is just that simple. We witness the feelings of our critical voice or other’s negative feelings without judgement and let those feelings into our heart rather than pushing back and resisting them.
When I say “open your heart”, I associate it with Heart Focused Breathing and Quick Coherence. and the importance of finding a positive emotional experience to revisit and associate with any event or experience that you choose to be in charge of your emotions.
The idea is to always choose to be in charge of your emotions.
Please consider setting a goal to check on your “inner voice” at least six times a day to initiate the shift you desire to create a supportive inner voice rather than the critical voice that is “normal” for most people.
Witness that voice without criticism, condemnation or judgment. As your brain changes itself to support your request for new structure to allow the inner voice rather than resist it, you will notice a reduction in impact from the content of that voice.
As you progress in this process, it will soon be time to train you inner voice to be the cheerleader in your life instead of your dark passenger always finding the worst in every situation. However, our first goal is to commit to the use of the HeartMath skills on a regular basis throughout the day to increase our resilience and coherence so we have the energy to cope with any and all emotional challenges.
Please let me know if you have any questions or experiences to share.